Roles:


Cloud - Coshi
Aeris - Otachi
Tifa - Coshi
Red XIII - (Out visiting Cosmo Canyon)
Barret - Otachi
Yuffie - Coshi
Cid - Otachi
Cait Sith - Coshi
Vincent - (Locked up in a coffin for some unknown reason)
Sephiroth - Coshi
Zidane - Coshi
Garnet - (Out doing an ad for Coke)
Vivi - (Visiting black mage village)
Eiko - Otachi
Steiner - Coshi
Quina - Otachi
Freya - (..Somewhere.. else..)
Amarant - (See above)
Kuja - Coshi

Given Scene: Utter darkness

Tifa: Where are we?

Cid: Yeah, where the (BEEP) is this?!

Sephiroth: ..I believe we are in need of a flashlight.

Eiko: Why don't I summon pheonix?

Yuffie: Phoenix? You mean materia, right? Where's it stashed, little kid?

Eiko: Hey, I'm not little! I don't know what materia is, but the power is in my horn.

Cloud: It isn't just me, right? Everyone else sees black, too..?

Quina: Does materia taste good?

Sephiroth: ..Fools.

Aeris: ?

Steiner: ~running around bumping into people in the dark~ PRINCESS?! Where are you?

[ Coshi: We left her out of the fic. o.O; ]

Quina: Does fic taste good?

Kuja: ~sniff~ It's too dark.. I want Bobo..

Barret: WHAT?! You're afraid of the dark?! ~sniff~ ..Me too.

Tifa: Uh.. there, there.. ~pats Barret awkwardly~

Aeris: ~sweatdrop~

Cloud: Am I the only one hearing voices..?

Eiko: Voices? I talk to moogles, does that count?

Yuffie: Enough chatter! Surrender your materia!

Cid: How the (BEEP) can you think of materia at a time like this?!

Zidane: What's that.. I keep hearing a pretty girl's voice talk about materia..

Eiko: !!! T-that was me!

Zidane: Not you, Eiko..

Eiko: Oh no! My sweetheart hates me!

Yuffie: Who's the cutie who wants to know? <3

Cid: Everyone shut the (BEEP) up!!!

Tifa: Cid, I doubt aimless curses will prove an asset to the given situation.

Eiko: My ears!! They burn!!!

Cloud: So many voices.. .. .. ..Sephiroth..?

Cid: Shut up Cloud!

Sephiroth: Myes, and what would you want, you acursed chocobo head?

Quina: Chocobo eggs taste gooood. *_*

Kuja: So dark.. ~shiver~ I want my dwagon..

Barret: You wuss.

Caith Sith: Look who's talking.

Barret: Look who hasn't been talking for the last 20 minutes!

[ Otachi: Coshi told me to say that. O.o ]

[ Coshi: MhmYES! XD ]

Cait Sith: I've been busy plotting - er, I mean, of course I would never double-cross Cloud..!

Aeris: ?

Cloud: ..I trust everyone. o.o

Sephiroth: Hmyes, and that's what makes you so stupid.

Zidane: ~flirting with Yuffie~

Eiko: ~yells at Sephiroth~ That's no way to treat a lady!

Cloud: Hey! I'm a man! ..That.. ..uh.. ..incident with the dress was.. ..temporary..!

Aeris: ~sweatdrop~

Tifa: Er.. yeah..

Steiner: Why did you even include me in the fic? o_o;

[ Coshi: ~shrug~ o_O Garnet's out doing an ad for Coke, Red's visiting his Grandpa in Cosmo Canyon, Vincent is mysteriously locked up in a coffin.. ..other people are just.. ..somewhere.. and, since you were available, you're here! ]

Steiner: .. ~sits and shuts up~

Quina: Does anything taste good here?

Kuja: Damnit, if only it were lighter. Then I could get back to my daily evil deeds!

Eiko: I've had enough of this. ~pulls out flute and summons pheonix~

Pheonix: ~sets Kuja's hair on fire~

Kuja: AAAAH! My beautiful hair!! ~runs around in circles~

Tifa: .. ~uses random materia-induced water spell~

Kuja: @_X

Eiko: Hey! Now it's dark again and I spent like, 30 MP on that summon! X_o

Tifa: Uhh.. here. ~hands Eiko an ether~

Eiko: Why thank you! (Mental note: Make Tifa new role model)

Tifa: ~sweat~ Heh.. I just happened to be carrying the item bag.. even though it's CLOUD'S turn..

Cloud: Huh? o.o ~pops back to reality~

Tifa: Were you daydreaming again?

Cloud: Uh.. ..no..

Barret: ~thinks outloud~ I wanna Pikachu plushie!

Tifa: Thanks for sharing that, Barret. ~sweat~

Aeris: ~sweatdrop~ ~sits and reads "Easy Gardening"~

Tifa: How can you read in this light?

Aeris: I eat a lot of carrots.

Quina: Carrot? Where? ~stumbles off~

Sephiroth: NO! Not the Pikachu!!! It must be evil because it is not SQUARE!

Cid: Can't you just (BEEP)ing SHUT UP?!!

Sephiroth: (Mental note: Kill Cid.)

Quina: ~sits down~ I hungy.. ~stomach rumbles~

Kuja: I don't think there's any food around here.. ..unless you count the cat. He could be eatible.

Cait Sith: EEP.

Quina: Yesss.. And weird mog will taste good with frog jam! *_*

Tifa: Uh.. you sure you want to eat Cait Sith..?

Cait Sith: NO! I'm scrawny, bitter.. my mog is a stuffed animal.. ..and I have RABIES! ~froths at the mouth~

Quina: Ooooohhh!! POP!!!

Tifa: Where the heck did you get rabies?! Have you been hanging around Red too long, Cait?

Red XIII: ~would resent that remark had he been included in the fic~

Aeris: Well what's the point of me being in the fic??!! ~smacks both Coshi and Otachi over the head with her staff and walks off~

Steiner: The maiden hast departed.. ..I shall take my leave as well. I am not needed. ~majikally disappears~

Eiko: o.o ~hugs Zidane~ ^-^

Zidane: .. ~kissed by Yuffie~ @_@ It's great being popular.

Guy in moogle costume: It's hard being popular! I should know..

Tifa: .. (Hm.. Aeris is gone, now I'm all alone with Cloud..)

Cloud: ..

Barret: ~hugs his Pikachu plushie which majikally appeared at his wish~ PIKACHU!!! I (BEEP)ING LOVE YOU!

Tifa: ..love..

Cloud: What's that you said?

Tifa: Nothing.

Eiko: ~glare~

Yuffie: Zidane's mine, little kid. Scram!

Cid: ~sets up a tea set on a rock~ NOW ALL OF YOU SIT DOWN AND DRINK YOUR (BEEP)ING TEA!

[ Otachi: Heh, I just HAD to put that in here. ^_^ ]

[ Coshi: ROTFLMFAO! XD THAT WAS SOOO RANDOM! ]

[ Otachi: Heh, thanks! ]

A bunch of moogles: ~sit down and drink their (BEEP)ing tea~

Everyone: ~sweatdrop~

Cloud: ~stares blackly into the tea~ I see dead people.. .. ..

Tifa: .. ..In the tea?! ~pushes hers away~

Cid: I SAID DRINK THE (BEEP)ING TEA!! ~pulls Barret and his gun arm over~ WATCH OUT, I'M (BEEP)ING ARMED!!!

Barret: o.o ~sweat drop~

Cait Sith: .. The tea cured my rabies! ~grows a tentacle~

Tifa: Uh.. ..Cid, what's in this? o_o;

Cloud: Deeeaad peopleee.. .. ~keels over twitching uncontrollably~

Cid: There's no (BEEP)ing dead people in it! And I didn't make it, that Qu did!

Quina: ~in Eiko's kitchen~ %D I'll put oglops, frog, and these weird rocks I stole from that girl! %D

Yuffie: ..My MATERIA!

Cloud: ~having what seem to be seizures~

Tifa: Cloud! ~holds him~ Are you okay?

Cloud: DEAD PEOPLE! ~flail~ .. .. .. ..Tifa..?

Barret: ~hugs his Pikachu~ I love my Pikachu. *_*

Sephiroth: ..Evil yellow beast.

Quina: You all hate my tea!! Now you die!! ~uses "Night"~

Everyone: ~falls asleep~

[ Coshi: THE END!!! ~bow~ ]

[ Otachi: XD !! ~falls asleep~ Zzzzz.. .. ]